Pardon me, Sir/Madame, but your sushi manners are atrocious.
Servers cringe when you unwrap your chopsticks and rub them together vigorously like some demented carpenter with a splinter phobia. Chefs weep when you pick up delicately seasoned bundles of nigiri with chopsticks and dip them rice-side down into an overflowing dish of soy sauce, the colour of which approximates the Don River owing to runoff from vast amounts of wasabi.
It’s not your fault. (Oh thank you wise one). The finer points of sushi etiquette or how to wield those chopsticks with confidence.